Turning 22

Today was my birthday. It was supposed to be a happy day, but it was actually a sad day. A few days ago 18 people were killed in a bus accident in Montenegro, and 29 suffered injuries. Some of the people that died that day were buried today. They were all Romanians. I consider it to be a freak accident and apparently the bus driver was trying to avoid some kids that were on the road and that's how the accident happened. I can't stop thinking of it, of how those people must have felt before they died, did they feel any pain? So tragic.. So I spent my birthday thinking of those people, I don't know them in person, but I think of them, and they didn't know that morning was their last day here.
I remember 4 years ago this day, Michael Jackson died, it was the day I turned 18. I will never forget that. It  was a sad day for everyone. 
I wonder what will happen next year on my birthday, will I be celebrating or mourning someone?

I wish..

"Everyone comes with baggage. 
Find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack."

Once step forward

       So many people inspire us every day. After years, we find old friends, colleagues or professors that we can say we are proud of and the fact that we met at some point in our lives. We realize that after 10 years, we all changed so much we've grown and learned so much. We realize after 10 years that a former schoolmate is famous, and we feel proud of him, in a way that we can not describe. Our lives intersected at some point and it feels nice to meet him/them after many years. You can tell maturity or time has left its mark on us, but we see things so different than we did when we were kids. Now I have learned to be attentive to details, the little things, they are the ones that make us appreciate life and everything we have. You don't know me, you only think you do, but you don't know who I really am. If someone would ask me what superpower I would love to have, I would definitely say that I didn't want to be invisible, because I already am. I go through life unnoticed, walk fast, maybe I'm afraid that someone would stop me. I'm fast and rarely look at people in the eyes, maybe I am afraid someone might discover who I really am, what lies beyond my brown eyes. Someone might discover the true me and my heart.
        Perhaps I often use excuses for who I am, because I am afraid of what others may think about me, I feel alone in my world, but the truth is  everything is my decision, I control everything in my life, but I often leave my  fears to control me. I like to read, and an author (I don't remember his name right now), once said, do not ever apologize for who you are. I repeat this every day and discover that I did change a lot in the last 10 years, I am a completely different person. I slowly learn to love myself and discover who I really am. I am learning to find my place in the world..